major hochstetter quotes

Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: I will arrange it. Radio Host: [Hogan pretends to be a Nazi sympathizer to get on German radio and discredit a propagandist] You read Mein Kampf, I believe. You live better than Goering and you're twice as big! Gen. der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: Captain Ritter has been ordered to acquaint himself with Luftwaffe prisoner-of-war facilities. Col. Wilhelm Klink: Did I say red dress? I mean, how do you roll a *head*? (a beat)Orders from the Fuhrer himself were not to surrender and to fight to the death. Beggars can't be choosers, you know. Failure punishment execution by firing squad. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Yeah, that's not the code Oh, it's the old double-look method. Col. Robert E. Hogan Colonel Klink: No prisoner escapes from Stalag 13! Sgt. We had pistachio, but one of the guards shot it with a machine gun. Hans Georg Schultz: Colonel Hogan, if you ever escape Sgt. : I took a bearing from the roof of Klink's office. Sgt. I won't say a word. Col. Robert E. Hogan: And then Wagner's brother shoots Colonel Klink. Col. Robert E. Hogan: [Interrupting] HOLD IT! You can transfer to a frontline combat unit. I'm sorry you missed it, major, it was a great party. "Colonel Klink, when I received your invitation, for a moment I had forgotten who you were. I shall do it right away. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Hogan, I will not go down alone. Col. Wilhelm Klink: I am a man of many sides. Cpl. Major Hochstetter: WHAT IS THIS MAN DOING HERE? General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: I feel the same way. I will surround this camp with a ring of steel. Col. Wilhelm Klink: [Hochstetter is placing TNT in Klink's cells/cooler] But you're using the cooler to store it. Col. Robert E. Hogan: [talking about the show for Klink] All right, now, the main thing is to keep them entertained till the job is done. Release Dates It was three years ago, in November I think. SCHULTZ May I ask, are we deserting to Switzerland or Sweden? James 'Kinch' Kinchloe: You keep that up and Klink'll be down here in a minute and there goes the ball game! I'm not holding a girl. Col. Robert E. Hogan: Carter, you overpower him quickly and quietly. Major Hans Kuehn: Very interesting. I'd rather depend on me. Col. Robert E. Hogan: And I suppose, uh, she put her arms around you? Col. Robert E. Hogan: Ahhh. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter Louis LeBeau: Under the Geneva Convention, I don't have to teach you to dance. 'Achtung' is a command. Well, Colonel, what you say, hmm? Cpl. Hans Georg Schultz: [after failure to keep a straight face] I wasn't talking about you, Herr Commandant. Signed General Jodl for the F?hrer." The idea of Klink being a British agent is ridiculous. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: It is about his defense counsel. Which one would you cut, Shultz? If we're wrong, what are they going to do? Officer: [approaches Hogan] Might I assist you? Colonel Klink: That raid was a complete failure! Sgt. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Are you aware that, last Monday night, an American plane dropped a bomb on Gestapo headquarters? At the age of 13 Howard Caine (family name Cohen) moved with his family from his hometown of Nashville, TN, to New York City, where he began studying acting. NOTHING IS WHAT HAPPENED TO THE DUKE OF YORK! "Hogan's Heroes Quotes." Sgt. I don't want to hear any more of your lies. Can't hold their liquor. Hans Georg Schultz: When I say 'Achtung' that means that you all are to SNAP to attention. Hans Georg Schultz: You said it, big boy. Col. Robert E. Hogan: After two years here, who cares what they look like? The moonlight- it's beautiful on the laundry or the bakery. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Klink. Quiet you blithering idiot, I'm trying to think! Hochstetter: Why not? Peter Newkirk: Yeah, but how are you fixed for film? Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: What is this bungler doing here? Sardines? Cpl. Back to Stalag 13. Dr. Hermann Felzer: You asked me that in Berlin, Herr General. Even that will not discourage me. Chocolate bars? Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Birthday cake? [Major Hochstetter returns to Stalag 13, demanding that Klink surrender the man in hiding. Col. Robert E. Hogan: To buy something. Col. Wilhelm Klink: Now, is there anything I can get you, General, before you go to sleep - perhaps a glass of warm milk? No matter who you're calling it's still the wrong number because I don't even have a phone! Major Hochstetter: Kommandant Klink: a man who could have been great, except he wasn't very good. Col. Robert E. Hogan: Well, it's obvious, major. Andrew Carter: Yeah, and Klink's happy - nasty happy. Coming from the Gestapo, that sounds very funny. General von Rauscher: Hochstetter, I am in charge of this project. Cpl. Sgt. We don't want our audience walking out on us. Crazy credits In the credits, there is a 'Lieutenant Rosen' listed. [Klink brags that he is in tip-top physical shape]. Col. Wilhelm Klink: Yes, sir, I'm ignorant. General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: You read it to me, please, major. Col. Robert E. Hogan: Always a bridesmaid, never a bride. But, that's not the worst thing we did. Sgt. Col. Wilhelm Klink: All heads will roll, that's quite democratic. Back. General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: Neither am I. Col. Wilhelm Klink: Schultz, close the gates! Sgt. Traitors, all of you. This news has me so excited. : : General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: But, uh where is there to go in a prison camp? The ultimate weapon didn't quite work out. Col. Robert E. Hogan: You're right, the situation is hopeless, there's no solution, we're faced with an absolute impossibility. Col. Robert E. Hogan: Him I would let goldbrick. Sgt. Col. Robert E. Hogan: You're the same bunch of guys that put him in business. Col. Wilhelm Klink: I do. Have you read his book on the chain of command? General von Rauscher, Col. Wilhelm Klink: My dear major, there is no danger of it firing- General von Rauscher: Firing? General von Rauscher: She is my interpreter, Hochstetter. That *is* bigger than a piano. Col. Wilhelm Klink: [Col. Klink and Helga are listening to music being played by the POWs] You know, Helga, do you know that the whole of our beautiful national soul, our culture is expressed in "The Ride of the Valkyries?". Col. Robert E. Hogan: You're still going to send me home, aren't you? Colonel Klink: But that would mean I would have to be dead first! Sgt. General von Rauscher, Col. Wilhelm Klink: My dear major, there is no danger of it firing- General von Rauscher: Firing? Andrew Carter: Well, sure. You can depend on me. Pleasure, No. Hogan: Lucky for you, we're going to get you out of this country. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Yes, that does it. Col. Wilhelm Klink: I'm really not in need of another officer. . Col. Robert E. Hogan: Someone around here has to be. Sgt. Sgt. Sgt. But we can still get him. Carter, keep working oh, you do have insurance? Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: The gestapo never arrests the wrong man. Goering is a fat rat fink. Quotes [] Mueller looks at picture of Sgt. | Like coming home to mother's cottage. Sgt. Hogan: OK, I will. Louis LeBeau: The new girlie magazines must be in from Paris. Col. Wilhelm Klink: What's there to behold? Col. Robert E. Hogan: There's a rule or something? General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: Why don't you call headquarters and let them send over an expert. Sgt. Close the gates! Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Ja, Kommandant Klink, a man who could have been great, except he wasn't very good. [Hands over papers with orders to Klink] Colonel Klink: I sent her the kiss by mail? Who's "we"? : Curiously enough, Hochstetter couldn't have been a Major in the SS, simply because that rank didn't exist there. He is best remembered for playing the role of German Gestapo Major 'Wolfgang Hochstetter' in the television comedy series, Hogan's Heroes (1967 to 1971). Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Yeah, I could not believe it myself. Colonel Klink: Of course, you want me to handle it with my usual Klink efficiency, General. General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: Yes, but Klink is such a stupid one. Cpl. | Are you expecting any warm clothing? What is going on there? Cpl. Sgt. Col. Robert E. Hogan: [trying to persuade Col. Klink to call General Burkhalter] Why don't you give him a call, sir it means so much to him. Col. Wilhelm Klink: Oh, oh, Herr General, you're much thinner than I thought you'd be. I don't know the answers to any of those questions, but I saw an episode the other day with a smoking hot frauline in it, who Hogan out-foxed and had arrested by Maj. Hochstetter. I meant green dress, of course. You know that guy, Hitler, who wrote it? Col. Robert E. Hogan: I wasn't sure which was the right one, but I was certain you'd pick the wrong one. Col. Robert E. Hogan: And if he asks any questions? Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter Kinch: Achtung doesn't mean 'Good morning.'. Helga: Are you volunteering for active duty Herr Kommandant? What is going on there? Sgt. Col. Wilhelm Klink: Thank you, General Burkhalter. Col. Wilhelm Klink: Hogan, are you a spy? Andrew Carter: [mockingly] Lot of work to do. General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: I know, and it still mystifies me. General von Rauscher: She is my interpreter, Hochstetter. The most wanted man in Germany and we've got him. General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: But is Hogan ready to tell us about the Norden? Col. Wilhelm Klink: Major Hochstetter, you won't believe this. Am I not clever? : Col. Robert E. Hogan: You heard the commandant, now back to your post. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: YOU GIVE A BIRTHDAY PARTY FOR A PRISONER? Col. Wilhelm Klink: The Ping-Pong tournament is canceled. Hans Georg Schultz: [Very excitedly] It's Bee-yoo-ti-ful! Col. Robert E. Hogan: I have. Klink is bucking for rat fink. The Gestapo is taking over. Now, I know what you're thinking - I'm a writer; why don't I write it myself? Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: How do you explain this, Klink? Col. Wilhelm Klink: I'm sure Mrs. Burkhalter was famished when she arrived. Do you allow this sort of thing? You have chosen the most dangerous man in all of Germany as a witness. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: You have one simple alternative, Commandant. Col. Wilhelm Klink: Ha. Col. Robert E. Hogan: Because you could fly or because you were bald? Col. Robert E. Hogan: The party was for me, sir. : [everyone except Hogan continues to shout and sing]. General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: If I do, I'm liable to shoot him myself. Who's worried about firing? Schultz: Col. Hogan if you ever escape Schultz: Be a good fellow and take me with you. General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: Thank you. Col. Wilhelm Klink: [sarcastically] Really? I'm sorry you missed it, Major, it was a great party. We haven't had a friendly chat for some time. Carter: [answers the phone in a mock-German accent] I'm sorry, you've got the wrong number. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter : Col. Robert E. Hogan: [after Newkirk and Carter have been caught escaping] They weren't really trying to escape. General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: Klink, do not try to explain this incident to him. If they get you, I am next. If my head is to roll, all heads will roll. Mix 'em up. Col. Robert E. Hogan: Let's get our prisoner first. This page focuses on the career of Howard Caine, best known for his role as Major Hochstetter in the television series Hogan's Heroes, both as an actor and as a musician. Howard Caine. Hans Georg Schultz: Don't ask me, this is a decision for an officer. General von Rauscher: Responsible for the security of our witness. Uh, did you come on military business, or is this a social call? [pause] Carter: So what if you haven't told me who you're calling yet?No matter who you're calling it's still the wrong number because I don't even have a phone! : I have given it many hours of intelligent thought. Col. Wilhelm Klink: The highest authority? Cpl. No, wait a minute. Filming & Production Louis LeBeau: Maybe they'll drop us some USO girls. Anyone within a hundred yards of this rocket will be shot and reshot. [Schultz had been drinking wine all afternoon]. [He gives Schultz a feather headdress], Sgt. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Klink, a German officer has been insulted. Col. Robert E. Hogan: Please - not while I'm plotting. Come on, tell us about it. [a German guard is fending off POW Newkirk from a restricted area]. : You're not arranging right now for Zagoskin to escape to Russia? Col. Robert E. Hogan: Oh, no, no. Major Hochstetter Hogans Heroes Quotes: top 7 famous quotes about Major Hochstetter Hogans Heroes List 7 wise famous quotes about Major Hochstetter Hogans Heroes: I deal with the obvious. General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: Surprise, yes. I *am in charge of security* Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Of course not. I'm a cryptologist. Take a bottle and do not hurry back. How I could have been so fooled by Klink. Col. Wilhelm Klink: Yes, Major Hochstetter. Adequate. Please take your truck and its cargo some other place. Andrew Carter: Let's get out of here! Col. Robert E. Hogan: Colonel Klink, you're an evil man. Hans Georg Schultz: Don't they drink tea in France? Andrew Carter: I think it's much safer to think of something else. Col. Wilhelm Klink: Well, we are centrally located. You've made me homesick for Cleveland. Release Dates Col. Wilhelm Klink: Oh, I'll arrange that. General von Rauscher: Are you aware that I am in charge of this project, and that this is the inventor? : Cpl. If my head is to roll, all heads will roll. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Do you consider this adequate punishment, Kom-man-dant? Oh lovely tunnel I must say- pity it doesn't lead into a bank. Therefore Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: ALL HEADS WILL ROLL. Web. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: It was a great personal loss to me. Marya: Major Hochstetter is a genius, Putzie. : Sgt. I fully intend Hogan, why are you so composed? We got our rights; we're as good as they are. : Sgt. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: [sarcastically] Oh, thank you very much. General der Infantrie Albert Burkhalter: No, this time I want it done right. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter And I am operating UNDER DIRECT AUTHORITY OF THE GERMAN GENERAL STAFF. Col. Robert E. Hogan: So what? General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: Klink!, I am a Staff Officer. Peter Newkirk: [as Humphrey Bogart] Then droppen sie dead. We've got him. : General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: Unexpected, Yes. General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: Take my word, Klink, this is no time to be a sound sleeper. Col. Wilhelm Klink: It was a great personal loss to me. Hogan: [the phone rings while Hogan's men are cracking a safe] Answer the phone, tell him it's the wrong number. Filled with fear, frightened to express any kind of opinion. Schultz: They aren't giving you a blindfold. A new order is coming, a new order! Back! Col. Robert E. Hogan: You must know some nice kids. Col. Robert E. Hogan: Well, you could have asked Lily to dance with him at least once. Rate this quote: 0.0 / 0 votes 207 Views Share your thoughts on this Hogan's Heroes's quote with the community: 0 Comments Notify me of new comments via email. For possibly the first time, Klink is entirely sure of himself]Major Hochstetter: Well, now, Klink, are you ready to hand him over to me?Colonel Klink: Major Hochstetter! You're not gonna get anything out of me. He's made you an honorary Chief of the Sioux tribe. Sgt. : This is WHY Major Wolfgang Hochstetter Was PROBABLY Agent "Nimrod!" Many watching Hogan's Heroes have seen the episode, the Missing Klink. Company Credits General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: I have never had any trouble resisting you. Hans Georg Schultz: I said 'Achtung!'. General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: That's what's so amazing. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: And if you ever tell anyone, I will have you kept in this cooler for a year. Was it really Colonel Crittenden who was responsible for yesterday? You're still going to send me home, aren't you? Col. Wilhelm Klink: Oh, no. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: What is it at your camp, Klink? I want to know nothing. The war is back on! Col. Robert E. Hogan: [to Col. Klink] Who would want to escape from all this beauty? He has? Andrew Carter: Sure. Colonel Klink: I'm afraid I cannot accommodate you, Captain. Col. Wilhelm Klink: Perfect! [Hogan's typical obfuscation has just saved Klink's reputation before a Gestapo investigator - who has exited]. Pleasant, no. Col. Robert E. Hogan: That's a terrible thing to do. Col. Wilhelm Klink: [reading a list of invited people to the meeting] It doesn't have the name "Colonel Klink" in there. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Traitors, all of you. It wasn't for me. You are succeeding in doing, by yourself, what millions of enemy soldiers are unable to do: Bring the Third Reich to its knees. Col. Wilhelm Klink I'm warning you. I was playing pinochle with Captain Broomschmeel. Col. Wilhelm Klink: This time tell me the good news first. Bob Crane starred as Colonel Robert E. Hogan, coor. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. Hans Georg Schultz: Easy. Colonel Klink: I will thank him the next time I see him, huh? General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: I have every confidence in your ability along those lines. This is no trick at all. Alright, alright. Col. Wilhelm Klink: Then why do you want me to marry her? General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: EVERYBODY THOUGHT HE WAS STUPID! Col. Robert E. Hogan Col. Wilhelm Klink: Flattery will gain you nothing, my dear, Colonel. Sgt. It's so good when he leaves. Ja, I believe I have. Sgt. This whole thing doesn't makes sense. Thank you. Since when is he running this prison camp? When I say 'Achtung' I want you all to come to attention at once. Cpl. I want you to tell me in your own words exactly how did the radio detector truck get put out of action? [Hogan pulls out two pieces of cake from behind his back] Col. Wilhelm Klink: Oh, thank you, Hogan. Which wire, Colonel Klink? I'm a prisoner. Sgt. Colonel Feldkamp would have to be a Standartenfhrer. No one in or out without my permission. General von Rauscher [slams door shut]. The Adolf Hitler Bridge is still in business. Take them away. General von Rauscher: I AM IN CHARGE OF SECURITY- Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: WHAT IS THIS MAN DOING HERE? [Klink in a casual tone starts reading to himself the captain's orders paper], Colonel Klink: "All ranks are ordered to extend complete cooperation, assist without question. Hogan: You see, sir, today is one of our national holidays - repeal of prohibition. Col. Wilhelm Klink: Schultz, take him away. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter Yes, Major Hochstetter. The man can't dance. General von Rauscher, Col. Wilhelm Klink: Col. Robert E. Hogan: [surprised] I thought I'd done *everything* in this war! The Gestapo is taking over. Colonel Sitzer: We want you to keep it a secret until the presentation. Col. Wilhelm Klink Sometimes The Great Impersonation The Pizza Parlor The 43rd, a Moving Story How to Cook a German Goose by Radar Psychic Kommandant The Prince from the Phone Company The Safecracker Suite I Look Better in Basic Black The Assassin Col. Robert E. Hogan: They were going into town for a very good reason. Sgt. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: Witness? Cpl. Major Hans Kuehn: Yes, uh, Field Marshal Karl Von Streicher of the General Staff. General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: Order your men to search the area. One of these wires disconnects the fuse, the other one fires the bomb. Quotes.net. Peter Newkirk: Now you see that wouldn't be cricket. Col. Robert E. Hogan: Well, let's put it this way. [Myra and Newkirk are being held in a German prison]. Col. Robert E. Hogan: [discussing the Crittendon Plan] All I can say, Crittendon, is it better be good. Technical Specs, [repeated line, whenever Col. Hogans shows up], IMDb Poll Board's Favorite Christmas Song Performances, Who Is Do You Think Is The Most Funny Incompetent, Or Competent But Harried Boss. : Louis LeBeau: Then why are they bringing it here? I fully intend - - Hogan, why are you so composed? The Gestapo major demands Klink's cooperation, which Klink gives. Schultz: You are going to be executed in the morning. Sgt. General von Rauscher Marya Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: You will all stay away from that rocket. Hans Georg Schultz: I got into the wrong conversation. General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: I'm not worried about your life. : You saw me write down the message. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter General: What is this, you are not Gestapo? And who are we gonna believe? "However, the weather turned cold and my knee stiffened up, as it has since August the fourth 1917, when you panicked and almost killed the two of us in that training crash. Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: The execution takes place tomorrow as scheduled. Louis LeBeau: All you're gonna get is my name, rank and serial number. Cut the wire. General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: Klink, stop agreeing with me. Think of the things you two have been through together. Freddy is a chimpanzee. Huh! Official Sites You're lazy, you're fat, you sleep on duty. LeBeau glares at him] At 9:55, I go into the station master, and I tell him I have this package that has to go out on the Berlin Express. Did you hear me? Col. Wilhelm Klink: What are you waiting for? Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: [about Klink] Every year that man lives takes at least a century of the thousand year Reich! Col. Wilhelm Klink: All potato rations are cut in half for ten days. Now, I don't want to sound like I'm blowing my own horn but General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: You sound like a whole brass band. https://www.quotes.net/movies/hogan's_heroes_103035, https://www.quotes.net/movies/hogan's_heroes_quotes_103035. General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: They must be sending out the location of our rocket launchers. It's almost PAST time for Roll Call! Honestly, I could cry. Col. Robert E. Hogan: Carter? [Sgt. : General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: It just doesn't seem possible. Col. Robert E. Hogan: yeah, yeah ,yeah, yeah. What is this man doing here? Instead of your party, I'll be soaking my knee". Maj. Wolfgang Hochstetter: That is where he was truly brilliant. It's of great military importance. General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter: Not like you. Rate it: 0.0 / 0 votes 404 Views Translation Find a translation for this quote in other languages: Select another language: - Select - (Chinese - Simplified) (Chinese - Traditional) Espaol (Spanish) Esperanto (Esperanto) (Japanese) He has saved us all. Col. Wilhelm Klink: Yes, the Baron was clever alright but not quite clever enough. Cpl. [repeated line, whenever Col. Hogans shows up] Not a laugh in the book. : Take a deep breath." Major Bonacelli:"Is that an order?" Marya:"Hogan, and a colonel." Hogan:"So you found me out." Marya:"And I suppose the little one is a general?" LeBeau:"Disguised as a corporal." General der Infantrie Albert Burkhalter: Physical fitness is one thing. Col. Wilhelm Klink: I taught him everything he knew about flying.
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