But then again, there was no way the rest of the Phoenix staff knew about it, assuming Brian kept it to himself and went along with the campaign anyway. She doesn't appear to be doing that anymore. Eventually, she goes to the Police and gets Max and Paddy released at the cost of keeping her secret, as well as finally letting Max meet Daniel after his release.]] He has also appeared in Coronation Street, Emmerdale and Doctor Who. * OopNorth: Traditionally Lancashire, but there are a few characters from other parts of Northern England, such as Mick Bustin' (played by Birmingham native Noddy Holder) and Billy the Butcher (Newcastle). * ButtMonkey: Gypsy Joe in the first episode. It doesn't leave. Joe tells them that they've had a "run in" with the Belgrano Sisters, who are well known to do this sort of thing. * MessyPig: Played with by the pig Max and Paddy end up buying from a mad farmer. After discovering the girls, locally known as the 'Belgrano Sisters', are infamous for this, they get revenge by forcing them to steal some speakers for their television. ]]\, '''Brian:''' [[spoiler: Sponge and a bit of jam. ** A variant of this happens at the end of the same episode after Max and Paddy finally get some speakers for their TV and Paddy puts on his [[ParallelPornTitles Charlies Anals]] DVD. * AmusingInjuries: Gypsy Joe's broken leg when Max and Paddy accidentally drop him from a TV screen(which they're using as a stretcher) from a great height. * ShapedLikeItself: Raymond The Bastard is, as you'd expect, a bastard. in the process. The farmer sells them a breeding pig for 100, which he claims they can sell on for 300. ** In a deleted scene from the first episode, Paddy walks in on Max having some * AssShove: When Paddy was a child he used to frequently shove StarWars action figures up his arse and once had to be taken to hospital after sticking an Obi-Wan Kenobi figure up there. * DoItYourselfTheme: The theme song was written by Toni Baker and Peter Kay, and borrowed heavily from the theme to ''Series/BJAndTheBear''. Amazingly, no one calls them on it. You should wear a mask and a striped jumper! Login to create it. The two of them breakdown somewhere in the Midlands and take the campervan to a garage, owned by Mick Bustin. He had also stated in 2010, during an appearance on The Chris Moyles Show, that he wanted Sir Terry Wogan to play an Irish baddie when Max and Paddy go to a funeral in Ireland but, after a stag night, only have fancy dress magician clothes. However, the fight is prevented by a prison officer telling Max and Paddy to come with him. Menu. But by sheer confidence and the perceived urgency of the situation, they manage to pull it off. * MessyPig: Played with by the pig Max and Paddy end up buying from a mad farmer. [[spoiler: She tells the Police why Max and Paddy stole a school bus full of children (Max was trying to meet his long lost son), which gets them released from prison but (more immediately) gets them pulled out of the exercise yard just as Raymond The Bastard and cronies are approaching them with the intention of savagely beating and quite possibly killing them.]]. * DepravedHomosexual: While Raymond The Bastard is more evil than depraved, his first scene features him in the shower being lathered up by two of his cronies and complementing. * ContinuityNod: When Young Kenny appears in Episode Four, he still has the impossible to remove tiger facepaint that he got at Brians fun day in Series 2 of Series/PhoenixNights. After a raunchy night at the campervan, Paddy wakes up to find that they've stolen his wallet. ]], * [[spoiler: PrisonsAreGymnasiums: Episode Four includes a scene set in the prison's exercise yard and at the start of the episode, Paddy's cellmate challenges him and Max to a game of tennis.]]. [1], His roles on television include Wayne in The Street, Raymond the Bastard in Max and Paddy's Road to Nowhere and Cecil in Prime Suspect 5. ** The climax of Episode Two is a homage to ''Series/TheATeam'' complete with the theme tune playing in the background. * BearyFunny: Max and Paddy disguise themselves as dancing bears to obtain a TV screen from a supermarket. Comedy Rewind: Looking back at Sink Or Swim, The making of The Oldest Comedy Club In Britain, First Gig, Worst Gig: Schalk Bezuidenhout. ]], * StuffedInTheFridge: A literal version is discussed in Episode Four. 5.7K views, 31 likes, 1 loves, 50 comments, 46 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Best of British Comedy: Max and Paddy's Road to Nowhere - Raymond the Bastard Or as Paddy calls them, "Big Bob's [[PrecisionFStrike Bastard]] Beans". Max and Paddy Go To Prison | Peter Kay - YouTube 0:00 / 6:41 Intro Sign in to confirm your age This video may be inappropriate for some users. While waiting, Max and Paddy catch the train to Middlewood, which actually turns out to be the last one that day, so the pair are forced to trek back through the woods, but get lost. * ChekhovsGunman: Maxs ex-girlfriend Tina appears in flashbacks in Episode Two before playing an important role in Episodes Three and Four. * GreenEyedMonster: Billy the Butcher is murderously jealous of Paddy for replacing him as Max's bouncing partner. What? * HeroicSacrifice: Tina is determined to keep the secret that [[spoiler: Max is Daniel's father]] because it will destroy her family, despite that it means [[spoiler: Max and Paddy being in prison because her going to the police and corroborating their story will reveal everything. This leads to several arguments, especially when they realise the television doesn't have any speakers. I don't [[UnusualEuphemism drink from both pipes]] and [[HandsomeLech that lad]] ''definitely'' does not! Tracing the cow to a nearby farm, the pair head off to find the farmer and claim expenses for the damage to the van. * CampGay: Pepe, Raymond The Bastard's ([[spoiler:the kingpin of the prison wing where Max and Paddy end up]]) boyfriend. With Max's inferior tunnelling skills, sharing a cell with Cliff Richard is the least of Paddy's worries; his good looks are bound to cause problems in the shower and not just in competing for the soap. * ButtMonkey: Gypsy Joe in the first episode. [[spoiler: She tells the Police why Max and Paddy stole a school bus full of children (Max was trying to meet his long lost son), which gets them released from prison but (more immediately) gets them pulled out of the exercise yard just as Raymond The Bastard and cronies are approaching them with the intention of savagely beating and quite possibly killing them. [2] In 2011, he played his first major role in the feature film Screwed, directed by Reg Traviss, playing the part of Curtis Nelson. * TheYardies: Raymond the Bastard is black, a convicted criminal, and speaks with a Jamaican accent, so it's safe to say he qualifies as a Yardie. Paddy is forced to share a cell with a tennis-playing Cliff Richard impersonator who actually believes he is Cliff. * DisabledSnarker: A woman with a HookHand flips Paddy off when he tries his CasanovaWannabe shtick on her. The 'Row Row Row Your Boat' sequence on the bus is borrowed from Dirty Harry, and in the scene where The Wolfster writes his telephone number on a beermat and hands it to Max, it is clearly a Peter Kay beermat, tying in with Kay's TV adverts for John Smith's Brewery bitter. The pair come up with a plan to convince their fellow cellmates they are hardened criminals named the Phoenix Twins, in order to survive. They've got the wrong bus however, and are soon captured by the police and sent directly to prison. Things go from bad to worse when Max steals a school bus with Daniel on-board. Ironically, he's also gay, and Jamaica, where the original Yardies started out, is a country with a reputation for homophobia. Paddy is forced to share a cell with a Cliff Richard impersonator and tennis enthusiast. Facebook. This brilliantly observed comedy journey follows the exploits of these two modern outlaws as they escape the club in their prized motorhome and take to the open road, creating havoc across the country. * OohMeAccentsSlipping: When Max sings "Thats Why They Call It The Blues" in Episode Three, Peter Kays natural voice slips through more than usual. ]], * IWantMyBelovedToBeHappy: An example that is both romantic and non-romantic at the same time. ]], ** A more straight example comes in the last episode. PHONE Hello? Max and Paddy then dress as paramedics and use the TV under a blanket as a stretcher to get all three out of the building. Max convinces him the best thing to do is make the other prisoners believe they are not just two inept doormen, but feared gangsters called 'The Phoenix Twins'. Though Paddy [[ADateWithRosiePalms doesnt get very far]] before the volume wakes Max up. http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/article_history.php. What they fail to notice at the same time is that Shannon is carrying a revolver, which he uses to force a Little Chef employee called Brenda (played by Alex Hall) to open for the trio late at night. Also the farmer isn't very happy about the two killing one of his cows. Both Max and Paddy are oblivious to this. Language links are at the top of the page across from the title. The actor/comedian Reece Shearsmith turns up in this episode as one of Max's old friends. This joke is based around the rumour that Sunderland player John O'Shea is regularly teased by teammates for his physical resemblance to Patrick [=McGuinness=]. Paddy causes tension by burning Max's book on their campfire, but Max eventually forgives Paddy and begins discussing, accompanied by a flashback, his one true love: a dwarf called Tina, whom he met in 1994. How many kids does Christine McGuinness have? Later, Max spots in a local newspaper a 40th birthday message for his old school friend Kevin 'The Wolfster' Wolfson, who had moved to London some years before. * LeftTheBackgroundMusicOn: Episode Three contains a montage of [[spoiler:Max following his long lost son to school and trying to deal with the news that hes a father]] set to the Boyzone cover of "Father & Son". As is RaymondTheBastard. * PrisonEpisode: [[spoiler:Episode Four after being set up at the end of Episode Three. * AccidentalPublicConfession: Although it occurs in private; during an argument, Max's ex-girlfriend Tina frustratedly blurts out that [[spoiler: they have a child together.]]. He also keeps a poster of, * BigDamnHeroes: Tina has an offscreen one in Episode Four thats both intentional and accidental. Max has "How dare you" (delivered in a haughty tone) and "You only get a bucket and a half" (relating to the amount of semen a man can produce), and Paddy has "Paddy has needs" (relating to his sex drive). %%* SensitiveGuyAndManlyMan: Max and Paddy. See EpicFail.]]. After knocking down a cow in the countryside, Max and Paddy approach who they believe to be the farmer and ask for compensation. And Max going along with it until one of them goes too far. ]], ** Also Max and Paddy in Episode Four when [[spoiler: a news report about them, set up by Brian, is seen on one of the prison's TV; blowing their persona of rich gangsters and revealing to Raymond The Bastard that they have been lying to him.]]. Unfortunately, he meets his old flame Tina, who is then finds out is married to the Wolfster. Though Paddy [[ADateWithRosiePalms doesn't get very far]] before the volume wakes Max up. ]], ** Max and Paddy not paying the (admittedly extortionate) repair bill for their motorhome and instead [[spoiler: stealing it back (see MacGyvering), and taking all of the keys to cars the mechanics were working on and tossing them out of the motorhome one by one while driving off]] seems like this until the reveal that [[spoiler: the mechanics, ** Maxs attempt to [[spoiler: gradually tunnel out of prison. Paddy is not happy. The entire male staff of the Phoenix Club, * StuffedInTheFridge: A literal version is discussed in Episode Four. He either thinks he actually is Music/CliffRichard or just has a disturbing love of him; looking like him, having a painting of him on the wall surrounded by candles, and singing Millennium Prayer to it all night. ** [[spoiler: Paddy's cellmate in Episode Four.]] [1] A spin-off from Peter Kay's Phoenix Nights, the series follows the two Bolton doormen/bouncers Maxwell "Max" Bygraves (Kay) and Patrick "Paddy" O'Shea (McGuinness) as they tour around the UK in their campervan. [1] As is Raymond The Bastard. He's not. [[spoiler: Max decides not to tell his long lost son Daniel that he is his real father; allowing Daniel, Tina, and Kevin (Tina's husband and an old friend of Max who believes he is Daniel's father) to remain a happy family. * NoisySexNextDoor: In the first episode, Max and Paddy pull two girls at a nightclub and bring them back to the motorhome. Although Brian's actions were self-serving in that they helped to promote the Phoenix more than help Max and Paddy, there was no way he could have known that [[spoiler: he was putting them in danger.]]. 15Hopeless doormen Max and Paddy leave clubland and embark on a series of wild and exciting adventures in their prized motorhome, \"Easy Rider\" style. Max actually has to wear goggles to defend his eyes. * ThemeNaming: Max and his school friends all have nicknames derived from their names that end in "ster": Max-ster, Wolf-ster, Patel-ster, and [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment Foster-ster]]. Politically Incorrect!". After knocking down a cow in the countryside, Max and Paddy approach who they believe to be the farmer and ask for compensation. The pair come up with a plan to convince their fellow cellmates they are hardened criminals named the Phoenix Twins, in order to survive. Also Mick Bustin', but he's a car repair man, not a salesman. * AbsenteeActor: Jerry and Ray Von do not appear in the Phoenix Nights sections of the show with Marc Park ['That Peter Kay Thing'] taking over as Les Alanos' singer. * SeinfeldianConversation: Max and Paddy have these fairly regularly. On 22 February 2010, Peter Kay stated to The Sun that he and Paddy McGuinness planned to do more specials of Max and Paddy's Road To Nowhere. [[spoiler:They carry out a similar robbery at the end of the same episode, except this time the [[GoldDigger Belgrano Sisters]] are doing it for them]]. With Shannon now unconscious and arrested, Max and Paddy slip away from a police lecture - due to the fact that earlier in the episode they cut down a speed camera - and drive-off into the night. * NonIndicativeName: The Patelster, a friend of Max's friend the Wolfster. ]], * HeroicSacrifice: Tina is determined to keep the secret that [[spoiler: Max is, * OhCrap: Replace crap with fuck and youve got Mick Bustins exact reaction when he sees [[spoiler: that Max and Paddy have stolen the keys to all of his clients cars.]]. %%* SceneryCensor: At the end of Episode Four. * EmbarrassingNickname: When he was a child, Paddy wore callipers and braces and was nicknamed Spazzy Paddy. The pair are now in prison together after the school bus incident. Phoenix Nights Wiki is a FANDOM TV Community. [[GassHole A lot.]] This joke is based around the rumour that Sunderland player John O'Shea is regularly teased by team-mates for his physical resemblance to Patrick [=McGuinness=]. ]], ** Also, his and Paddy's attempts to sell a pig ''to a Halal restaurant! Max and Paddy's Road to Nowhere is Channel 4 Brit Com spun-off from the popular comedy Phoenix Nights that sees former Phoenix Club doormen Max ( Peter Kay) and Paddy (Paddy McGuinness) aimlessly travelling around Britain in a motorhome that they bought with the proceeds from faking an assassination and pocketing the cash during the final Elsewhere, ** Max and Paddy not paying the (admittedly extortionate) repair bill for their motorhome and instead [[spoiler: stealing it back (see MacGyvering), and taking all of the keys to cars the mechanics were working on and tossing them out of the motorhome one by one while driving off]] seems like this until the reveal that [[spoiler: the mechanics didnt do any work on the motorhome yet still tried to charge them 500. It doesn't leave a mess all over their motorhome, but it farts. * MistakenForGay: A running gag in the first episode is an African family camped near the motorhome catching Max and Paddy in seemingly compromising positions. Then Paddy walks in, switches off the radio, and wearily asks How many times are you going to play that song?, * LeftTheBackgroundMusicOn: Episode Three contains a montage of [[spoiler:Max following his long lost son to school and trying to deal with the news that, * LuxuryPrisonSuite: [[spoiler: Max and Paddy get one complete with duvets, a box of Terrys All Gold chocolates, and satellite TV after making out that they are rich gangsters and promising Raymond The Bastard 60% of their non-existent loot. ]], * HugeGuyTinyGirl: Taken to its absolute limit with Max (who is both tall and fairly large) and Tina (a woman with dwarfism). [[GassHole A lot.]] What Shows Have Been Renewed or Canceled. [[spoiler: Max and Paddy get stuck with the job of shovelling coal into a furnace while in prison, and Max says that therell be two kitchen jobs available once Raymond The Bastard arranges for two inmates to get locked in the freezer.]] See more of No Context Max and Paddy on Facebook. Me?! Episode 1's opening theme is instrumental and episodes 2 - 5's closing themes are too. HilarityEnsues. 14 * AmbiguouslyGay: Billy the Butcher has a Yandere-like obsession with Max, but insists he doesn't want to be with him in "a gay way." 15 They still end up in cells next door to each other though.]]. Get all the latest news and information in your inbox, with our range of email newsletters to meet all interests. Max in turn makes his own heroic sacrifice by [[spoiler: not telling Daniel that he is his father, and letting Tina's family remain intact.]]. Raymond the Bastard? [citation needed]. ** Despite being a one-shot character, Billy manages to get one by frequently adding the phrase "But not in a gay way" to anything that could be considered a DoubleEntendre. Guest starring Graham Walker of The Grumbleweeds. * DepravedDwarf: Subverted by Max's dwarf girlfriend, Tina, who's very much one of the nicest characters in the series. [[spoiler: Max decides not to tell his long-lost son Daniel that he is his real father; allowing Daniel, Tina, and Kevin (Tina's husband and an old friend of Max who believes he is Daniel's father) to remain a happy family. '''Brian:''' [[spoiler: Sponge and a bit of jam. Beginning on 12th November 2004, Road to Nowhere continued for six thirty minute episodes on Channel 4. You shouldn't upset him. [[HandsomeLech Paddy]] exploits his costume to feel up a little boy's mother. The pair are now in prison together after the school bus incident. * BavarianFireDrill: Max and Paddy posing as paramedics as part of their ZanyScheme to steal a plasma TV. -->And we don't take shit from anyone, the only thing we wanna do is have some fun. Their new moves lure two local girls, Tracey and Louise, back to the campervan, only for one of them to steal Paddy's wallet. Tina finally gets the duo out, but now before a payback for Potter Is due.Welcome to the Official Peter Kay YouTube channel! * MessyPig: Played with by the pig Max and Paddy end up buying from a mad farmer. * CelebrityParadox: In episode three, in the scene where The Wolfster writes his telephone number on a beermat and hands it to Max, it is clearly a Peter Kay beermat, tying in with Kay's TV adverts for John Smith's bitter. He has also appeared in Coronation Street, Emmerdale and Doctor Who.[2]. Stars Peter Kay, Paddy McGuinness and Lisa Hammond. ]], * EstablishingCharacterMoment: [[AxCrazy Billy the Butcher]] is introduced beating, * IWantMyBelovedToBeHappy: An example that is both romantic and non-romantic at the same time. Apparently, he wasn't much better as an actual child, stabbing his careworker 18 times with a potato peeler for making him play with a jigsaw puzzle that he didn't like. * MistakenForGay: A running gag in the first episode is a family camped near the motorhome catching Max and Paddy in seemingly compromising positions. * ChekhovsGunman / EarlyBirdCameo: Maxs ex-girlfriend Tina appears in flashbacks in Episode Two before playing an important role in Episodes Three and Four. * SchmuckBait: Raymond the Bastard telling Paddy to [[PrisonRape bend over and pick the soap up]]. Paddy is steaming drunk and has very loud sex in his bedroom while Max tries to have a drink and a chat with the other girl in the living room. * ToBeContinued: Episode Three ends on the cliffhanger of [[spoiler: Max and Paddy stealing a school bus full of children in an attempt for Max to see his son. * YouCanLeaveYourHatOn: Non-sexy variant, when the Phoenix Club staff (the male half, anyway) is forced to strip nude and get sprayed with disinfectant, Young Kenny is still wearing his hat. Tina finally gets the duo out, but now before a payback for Potter Is due. [[spoiler: She tells the Police why Max and Paddy stole a school bus full of children (Max was trying to meet his long lost son), which gets them released from prison but (more immediately) gets them pulled out of the exercise yard just as Raymond The Bastard and cronies are approaching them with the intention of savagely beating and quite possibly killing them. They soon discover that the old man who sold them the pig initially was actually the alcoholic father-in-law of the real farmer, and their money has probably all gone to the nearest pub. When Paddy insists that there's ''not'' a difference, Max calls him "Mr. The farmer sells them a breeding pig for 100, which he claims they can sell on for 300. * YouCanKeepYourHatOn: Non-sexy variant, when the Phoenix Club staff (the male half, anyway) is forced to strip nude and get sprayed with disinfectant, Young Kenny is still wearing his hat. Permissions beyond the scope of this license may be available from thestaff@tvtropes.org. After a stint in a porn film (a film called Willy Wanker and the Chocolate Factory - a gay porn parody of Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory) leaves Paddy humiliated, the campervan breaks down in the Midlands. Kay and McGuinness do not provide the DVD audio commentary. Unbeknowst to Max, Billy has become obsessed with Max and goes to all lengths to give Max what he wants. What they didn't realise was that that train was the last train and thus they end up camping in the woods. ** [[Film/MidnightCowboy Paddy going to an audition dressed as a cowboy while "Everybody's Talkin'" plays]]. Max and Paddy pose as members of staff, and Joe pretends to faint so an ambulance will be called while Max and Paddy steal the TV from the stockroom. Paddy is steaming drunk and has very loud sex in his bedroom while Max tries to have a drink and a chat with the other girl in the living room. * SeinfeldianConversation: Max and Paddy have these fairly regularly. ** Brian Potter squeezes a few indignant utterances of his signature phrase: "I don't know if you haven't noticed but I'm disabled" into his short cameo in Episode Four. * LukeIAmYourFather: [[spoiler: Averted. -->''''Don't know where we're going, got no way of knowing. * NonIndicativeName: Zahid Patel, a friend of Max's friend the Wolfster. Well? * DepravedHomosexual: While Raymond The Bastard is more evil than depraved, his first scene features him in the shower being lathered up by two of his cronies and complementing Paddy's genitals. * WhatHappenedToTheMouse: In the last episode of Series/PhoenixNights, Max and Paddy take off in the motorhome because the woman who paid to carry out the murder they faked has discovered the truth and will be sending people after them. She certainly doesn't agree with him. * MistakenForGay: A running gag in the first episode is. Maxs counter that he has a good stand-up wash in the sink once a week [[NotHelpingYourCase doesn't exactly help his case]]. A popular English comedy band who had a TV show in the 80's. How old is Mrs McGuinness? * SchmuckBait: Raymond the Bastard telling Paddy to [[PrisonRape bend over and pick the soap up]]. Paddy's full name is revealed to be Patrick O'Shea. * PrecisionFStrike: Mick Bustins OhCrap moment. [[spoiler: They're better known as the Belgrano Sisters ( "on account of all the sailors that have gone down on them"]]) and their MO is to pick up sailors in nightclubs, [[SlippingAMickey drug them]], and rob them blind. * IAmAHumanitarian: When pretending to be brutal gangsters, Paddy pretends to have eaten the last person who insulted him, with a perfectly serious face. He points the gun at Max who tells him he needs help. * ThePigpen: Paddy considers Max to be this. Their disguises are far from convincing, their acting is terrible, and their "stretcher" is the stolen TV under a blanket. * ShotInTheAss: [[spoiler:Where Billy the Butcher's bullet ends up hitting Paddy. . He either thinks he actually is Music/CliffRichard or just has a disturbing love of him; looking like him, having a painting of him on the wall surrounded by candles, and singing Millennium Prayer to it all night. This joke is based around the rumour that Sunderland player John O'Shea is regularly teased by. See EpicFail.]]. * ChekhovsGunman: Max's ex-girlfriend Tina appears in flashbacks in Episode Two before playing an important role in Episodes Three and Four. ** Upon [[spoiler: being sent to prison for stealing a school bus full of children (see BigDamnHeroes)]], Max and Paddy face the unpleasant ordeal of a rectal examination [[spoiler: to ensure they're not smuggling anything into the prison.]]. After an altercation with a camp inmate called Pepe, Max and Paddy are soon confronted by the main man of their wing, Raymond The Bastard (played by Everal Walsh), who is also Pepe's boyfriend. Soon, their old Phoenix Club boss Brian Potter (played by Kay) unexpectedly comes to visit, along with a cake, announcing that he's organising several events to help speed up their release. In 2011, he played his first major role in the feature film Screwed, directed by Reg Traviss, playing the part of Curtis Nelson. . * DoItYourselfThemeTune: The theme song was written by Toni Baker and Peter Kay, and borrowed heavily from the theme to ''Series/BJAndTheBear''. A second series of the show was initially planned for 2006, but Peter Kay instead confirmed a third series of Phoenix Nights (which as of 2023 has not yet happened).
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